My name is Will and I am a very grateful recovering alcoholic today. Four short months ago I was alone - I was at the jumping off place. I was in that dark hole we as performing alcoholics know so well. I was praying for the end. I could no longer take care of myself, my home or my career and the insanity had taken over. The only thing that mattered to me was my next drink. My life had become unmanageable and I screamed out for my pain and suffering to end.

Somehow, somewhere my plea was heard and I was to embark on an amazing journey of discovery. As a newcomer to this wonderful Fellowship I would wish to express my feelings of deep gratitude for the people who gave me hope at my very first meeting, not that I recall very much about it. I crawled up the stairs on my hands and knees, a broken man - a soul who had lost his way. With no idea what lay behind the door, I managed to compose myself enough to enter the room where I was to be picked up and shown nothing but unconditional love. Where I was told: “You need never drink again.” and “Don't lift the first drink and you won’t get drunk.”

At first it seemed like everyone was speaking a foreign language, talking about the Steps, the Traditions and a Programme of Recovery. Somehow I felt I belonged as I had found what I had been looking for all my adult life. I was told over and over again to stick with the winners, get in the middle of the bed, don't lift that first drink, do plenty of meetings and get plenty of phone numbers. Somehow their message began to have an effect on me.

Today I believe that I was guided to AA by a power much greater than myself whom I now call my Higher Power or HP for short. I wake up in the morning and hand my day over and let my day be guided by Him. During my day I am constantly amazed by things that happen. I call them God-incidences, as, if they had been left to me they would never have turned out that way. Small simple things that you took for granted when performing can bring such joy and happiness into every day because we are open to the wonderment that is a sober life.

For those just in the door or for those who are suffering, please I beg of you before you lift that first fatal drink, pick up the phone and talk to someone. If you don't understand something, ask.

Will
Tuesday night Arden House, Leven